A Different View of Anger

OK, so we're talking about anger. I had a frustrating experience a few weeks ago that I'd like to relate.

Since we've been studying Intelligent Design in Sunday school, I've been perusing some ID books. I picked up one book on the reliability of the bible while at Mardel's. This book, claiming to defend the bible, has a chapter explaining how the bible is wrong. In explaining that the bible isn't a science textbook (which it technically is not) it claims that since the bible mentions unicorns and dragons, and since we KNOW those never existed, then the bible can't be trusted on THOSE issues. But it gets the more important spiritual matters right? How do you know what's true then?

The point is, you interpret science with the Bible, not the other way around, and when I see that being done backwards, it makes me angry. How do you defend the bible by putting yourself arrogantly above God's Word as if you know everything and need to set God straight? Grrr.

OK ... just breathe.

So what do I do with that anger? What should any of us do with our anger over something? (or any overpowering emotion or temptation?) Remember that we mentioned before that anger is an emotion. It happens. It informs us something is wrong. So what do we do? Can we even do something? Or are we hostage to our feelings?

If you know me, you know I absolutely believe that is NOT true. The bible clearly states, "Be angry but do not sin." In a book called "7 Habits of Highly Effective People" Stephen Covey explains that there is a gap between a given stimulus (angry feeling) and our response. In that gap is our decision making process.

Stimulus --> Decision --> Response

We might have ideas and responses already pre-programmed, but that just means we decide not to consider our action and just go off instinct. Not always a good idea.

What do you do? Well, let's have a look at some of the things people do with their anger (or other emotions as well), and how the bible addresses them.

1. Drown it: Some people use alcohol or drugs to cope, but Ephesians 5:18 says "do not get drunk with wine, ... but be filled with the Spirit." Ok, so we can't do that.

2. Burry It: Some people literally 'bury' their feelings in stuff. Some call it "retail therapy." Go shopping and feel better by buying a new [fill in the blank]. Have you ever seen the show “Hoarders”? No thanks. But what does the bible say? "Though shalt not covet." Seeking comfort in and desiring material gain is not a biblical teaching. At best it is mismanaging of God’s money that He has given you.

3. Ignore it: I know, let's just not think about it. Like a bad dream, just pretend it isn't real. Remember, however, that Proverbs 13:12 says, "Hope deferred makes the heart sick." Recall the 4 stages we discussed earlier. Unresolved anger turns to bitterness. A bitter person has no hope. but we do have hope, in Christ. So, ignoring = bad.

4. Direct it / Display it: Let's just express it. "That sorry excuse for a human being! I'm gonna let him have it!" In Matthew 5:21-22 Jesus says, "You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not murder, and whoever murders will be in danger of the judgment.’ But I say to you that whoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment." Uh oh ... being angry is the same as murder? Yikes, I'm in trouble.

But then where does that leave us? What is the answer? What we need is a change of perspective. Not just a rule for what we DO with anger, but we need a new way of looking at anger.

Many people claim to have a "Temper problem". Possible? Sure some people have shorter fuses, but I think mainly we have a point of view problem. Romans 12:2 says, "do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind." Who we are is transformed? We get a new mind? Exactly.

The way the world deals with their anger (or other emotions) is not the way Christians should handle our anger. Allowing our anger some control is of "this world" or what the bible refers to as our "Flesh." Basically that just means the sinful nature, the desire to do bad, that we have in us. In Galatians 5 Paul explains that "the works of the flesh are evident, which are: adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lewdness, idolatry, sorcery, hatred, contentions, jealousies, outbursts of wrath, selfish ambitions, dissensions, heresies, envy, murders, drunkenness, revelries, and the like." Hatred. Contentions. Jealousies. Wrath. ... Anger.

Every last one of the items on that list are based in selfishness, ego, and conceit. If that who we are called to be as Christians? Is that what Jesus taught? Is that how God defines goodness and righteousness? Are we supposed to be selfish? ... An great big "NO!!" Remember what Jesus said, First will be Last, Last will be First. If you want to be great you have to be a servant to all. We're not selfish people, and acting on anger is a selfish thing.

But you are sometimes selfish. You do get angry.

Are you in Christ? 2 Corinthians 5:17 says, "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation." That anger and selfishness, the "flesh", the sinful nature ... that's the old you. Jesus died so we could be made new.

Galatians 5 says, "those who are Christ’s have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires." Those passions and desires, including anger, only have the hold on you that you let them. Think about it. Jesus died to rid of us of the guilt of sin. Because of that we no longer have to suffer what God's justice demands, namely hell. But this ALSO says sin wasn't the only thing to die with Jesus. Our flesh, our sin, and all those desires and passions died also.

Wrap your head around this one: we CHOOSE to return to those old habits and ways of thinking. Galatians 5 also says, "If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit." We have a choice. By hanging on to the old habits and ideas from our old life we are choosing to stay in our sinful, old, dead life.

Imagine falling into sewage. Then after getting cleaned up you find someone has laid out nice, new, clean and super comfy clothes ... but instead you put the old nasty clothes back on. That is exactly what we do. Let's put on the new life.

What does that life look like? Again, back to Galatians 5 (great chapter by the way, go read the whole thing) "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control." Everything on this list is the exact opposite of Selfish. The old life before Christ was selfishness. The new life in Christ is humble.

Then why am I still selfish?
Think about it: are unsaved, non-born again people capable of acting in non-selfish ways? Can they show love and kindness? Absolutely. They can be good neighbors and faithful friends. However, the bible is clear that our hearts, before Christ, are at the core selfish, sinful, and in rebellion to God. A really polite rebel is still a rebel. But if those who are basically sinful can sometimes choose to do good, then why is it so hard to believe that those who have a new life and the Holy Spirit in them can sometimes choose to sin?

Part of the problem is that we haven't unlearned old habits, and we hold on to the familiar former life. But simple behavior changes are not the answer.

REAL CHANGE comes from the Gospel. We're changing our perspective, remember? That new perspective is to see everything THROUGH the cross. Through the fact that Jesus died for us and we are new creatures.

In Matthew 18 Jesus tells the parable of The Unforgiving Servant.
Basically, a king forgives a servant of a ton of debt. This guy owed the equivalent of millions of dollars. The servant begs mercy and the king gives it. Then the servant finds someone else who owes him a few days worth of income, and he has the guy thrown in jail. The king finds out and has the guy punished. We hear that and say, "well yeah, of course." Because of what had been done for him, he should have been willing to behave accordingly.

We are no different.

Because of the price Jesus paid for us, because of the great mercy and grace that was shown for us, we should also live our lives accordingly. Jesus showed the ultimate in selflessness and love. In light of THAT, we should also be selfless people.

We should always compare our situation to HIS FORGIVENESS instead of our own gain or feelings. We’ve been forgiven much. In light of that LOVE … how can we honestly justify anger or bitterness?