Ok, since I am doing an article on anger let's get the gratuitous Yoda quote out of the way: "Fear leads to anger; Anger leads to hate; Hate leads to suffering." Star Wars, it may have terrible theology, but there sure are some catchy one-liners.
The first thing I think we need to understand about anger is that it's natural. Anger is an emotion, a feeling. Like all our feelings, it just happens. Simply feeling the emotion of anger is not wrong, bad, or sinful. However, we have to be aware of what our emotions are. Simply put, they are indicators. Our emotions just let us know something about the situation we're in. While they can be powerful, they do not necessarily control us. They just are. They can be misleading, and they can be trained.
Anger is no different.
Something can make us angry when really we have no reasonable ground to be upset. Ex: You are in a hurry and someone is going 55 mph in a 60 mph zone. Maybe their car can't go any faster. Maybe they didn't notice the last sign when the speed limit increased. Whatever the reason, 60 is the speed LIMIT. They don't have to go 60. They are not doing anything wrong. You are just frustrated because of your circumstances, not because of anything they are doing.
And we can train ourselves to not get upset at certain things or people. Ex: This is the definition of tolerance. You have a boss, a co-worker, a classmate or teacher who just ticks you off every day. Well, to have a more peaceful life you manage to ignore them, dismiss them or just accept that's how they are and not let it bother you.All of that to say, our anger does not control our actions.
Anger simply informs us about the situation, how we respond is our own choice. The bible makes that clear in Ephesians 4:26, "Be angry, and do not sin."
There are a few stages that our anger will follow if we let it.
Stage One is where we just leave it alone and let it fester or sour. Like milk left out on the counter it just starts to go bad. A simple emotion informing us of mistreatment now becomes bitterness. Ephesians 4:31, "Let ... bitterness ... be put away from you."
Stage Two is where our anger starts to show. It's soured, and we have become bitter. Everyone can see that something's upsetting us. Even when we try to pretend, it's obvious something wrong, and it comes out in what we say and do.
In Stage Three we're no longer aware of why we're angry in the first place. The sour, bitter mindset has just become part of who we are, and we no longer know why. We just know something wrong, and we're not happy about it.
This leads quite naturally to Stage Four: Our anger has turned into contempt and our foul attitude stinks up the place. Have you ever been around someone who's just upset and negative about everything? They're just not pleasant to be around. Their personality "stinks", and their bad attitude comes out in every part of their life. No one wants to be around that person; certainly no one wants to BE that person. But this is what happens when we ALLOW anger to control our lives and not deal with it.
OK, so what do we do?
Jesus says that if we're angry with our brother without cause we are guilty of murder. (Matthew 5:22) He even goes on to say that it is so important to not hold on to anger that we should drop everything and go resolve it. (vv. 23-24)
"But you don't understand; I'm REALLY angry. I try, but I can't help it." That's not what Jesus said. Jesus said you can help it. Next week we will take a look at how.
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